This morning, before I’d managed to drink a cup of coffee (in fact, while it was brewing), Simon noticed and immediately exploited a breach in the household defenses.
Simon is an absolute expert at identifying and exploiting breaches in household defenses. Door didn’t quite click shut? He’s on it. You can work that latch open if you jiggle the door just right? Reporting for jiggle duty. Install a new sliding latch on the lazy-Susan-style corner cabinet where he keeps trying to break his little arm? Simon has observed and duplicated your opening procedure, you foolish grown-up. Keep all the dining room chairs flat on their sides to prevent table-climbing? Hello? You can climb on chairs’ sides, too! And it’s more fun because they slide around precariously and scratch the floor! I’m pretty sure he can actually SMELL errors like a dog’s water bowl left unguarded on the floor. And to him, the enormous and truly fugly plastic fence around our potentially-finger-removing parrot’s cage looks like a neat climbing structure that can facilitate his bonding with said bird.
So, this morning, little bits grabbed our dog’s empty water bowl and headed for the accidentally-open bathroom door. What to do in this fascinating and taboo realm? Simon doesn’t waste time by agonizing over the options. No, Simon just started bailing out the toilet. Because that’s how it’s done, people.